The Glengarry Glen Ross Minute

Two guys chew over their favorite Mamet movie - one minute at a time.

Minute 57: To boldly go… and get the chalk

February 7th, 2018

The fellas are very excited about the “get the chalk” minute. There’s WAY too much time spent on the pronunciations of “katsup” to open the episode. Shelly comes in with the greatest victory cry known to man. Shelly’s subterfuge has Matt at sixes and sevens. A new day is dawning for Shelly. Lunch break comes up quick at Premiere Properties. George is so earnest and true in his congratulations of the machine. Is this the first utterance of “the machine” that occurs in the film? Hollywood always has the bad guys, bald and smoking. The fellas want to know what exactly is happening to the sales force in Williamson’s office during the interrogations. The boys attempt a “who would they play” with the “non-fruity” Star Trek cast and surprisingly, it works pretty well. Set phasers to fun and flowers for Algernon are the apparently the best old man jokes one can hope for. We can see just over the horizon that a storm cloud of anger and marlboros is fast approaching and that cloud’s name is Davey Moss. Stay tuned!

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Minute 56: Tainted by Patel

January 31st, 2018

Bill’s life is in no imminent danger, but he does want to kill himself eventually, which Matt is totally on-board with. Matt’s got a lot of great gummy ideas but Bill claims he would not eat them all. Lawrence Taylor gets a lukewarm, coked-up “atta boy.” What do George Aaranow and a Roomba have in common? Ricky throws the penalty flag on Williamson... 15 yards for roughing the saleman.  Williamson “Vanna’s" the leads in Ricky’s direction. In an attempt to prove he can sell anyone, Ricky tries to sell Cobra Commander. Ricky will go to the cousin of Williamson and they’ll do some figuring. The Fizzler strikes again. Bill offers up a phenomenal and vexing question about all these “contracts.”  Finally, the fellas engage in what can only be described as a series of misguided “Who would they plays.” 

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Minute 55: Those Were V@ginas!

January 24th, 2018

The fellas are rounding off the rough edges this week with some 120 grit fun! Dikembe Motombo politely requests that you cease bringing what you have, into his general area. White Chocolate is no murderer. Bill introduces a new title to Matt’s numbers segment (with a jingle to soon follow... joy of joys), and it goes just how you’d expect. Roma continues to meander throughout the office.  George, who is never not stating the obvious, is nervous about talking to the cops. Ricky’s calculated and studied assessment of the CPD, “they’re stupid.”  “Inured to it” understandably, gets cut. The truth is the easiest thing to remember. Dave, you can just stop at “deadbeats.” The fellas carefully reminisce about the oddity and ubiquity of the polish-joke structure. Bill brings a dandy quote for the corner and shocking no one at all, Matt makes it mostly about him.

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Minute 54: Bring Your Own Sharpie

January 17th, 2018

Is there too much Ricky on the podcast? Perhaps, but Zumbo don’t care. The new, upstart streaming service, Holo needs the fellas to provide some of their trademark mediocre content. Elia Kazan gets spontaneously ushered into the quote corner. This episode goes out to Brad “the rad” Lohaus. How would George fare selling insurance? Ricky forgets for a moment that Williamson is a shit-head. Matt is not friends with any hit-men, to his knowledge. It’s really up to all of us to decide what exactly Mitch and Murray are going to shit. Williamson seems overly concerned with Ricky going out just hours after a robbery. Ricky might have an impulse to choke out George. The boys get overly emotional at altitude. Matt likes to prep for his fun but don’t ever ask to borrow his Sharpie. Bill tries to zero in on a James Mason impression. Romaville ideas continue to flow like Cutty. Liev Shcrieber joins Elia Kazan in the quote corner. The boys hit for the cycle and get to all 4 jingles this week, which makes award-winning songwriter Bill very happy.

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Minute 53: Things Get Stole

January 10th, 2018

Mokeski is a beast. George is no fucking good. Ricky doesn’t know what he’s gonna do all month. Bill is gullible. And Matt’s a buffoon.

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Minute 52: Duck And Buck or Overwhelmed by Underwoods

January 3rd, 2018

Matt loves old typewriters and hopes to one day, pending Hanks’ interest, host a podcast about them. Bill prefers the company of older folks when ringing in the new year. Matt shouts out the Buck-ster this week. Bill will happily go all-Duckworth on you without missing a beat. Baylen smiles like he wants to take Ricky out back for some some real Bond-esque, testy torture. Bill gets all “theater professor” on us for a spell. George looks to seek comfort in the loving reassurance of Richard Roma. George’s studio apartment is all of our studio apartments. The fellas look a bit forward to the upcoming minutes and the excitement mounts. Bill confirms Roma’s hair is still in flippity mode. The fellas bemoan how revealing movie trailers have become. Matt loves Bill’s rock and roll voice in the new “who would they play” jingle. The boys cast Brad Pitt this week. A Happy New Year and hearty “thank you” to all who listened this year.

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Minute 51: Please Don’t Leave!

December 27th, 2017

This week we learn Bill apparently takes on all comers and he clearly doesn’t judge. Relationships get redefined, again. Innuendo-y names abound. Bill unveils his finest jingle to date. A new ride at Romaville is born, ya know, for kids. The fellas enlist Jude to help keep the listeners they have already. This is by far the most x-rated GGGR minute to date. The boys giggle and grin at “Bubbie.” Bill has done some exhaustive Cadillac research. Ricky heads out to the Six Flags safari with George in tow. Baylen is looking as imposing as ever. George is nervous that Ricky is gonna rile-up the cops and as such, he has been stress eating. In a landmark moment, Bill finally solves the decades-long question of why George won’t go to lunch. Bill is suddenly a CPA. What in the fuck is happening on the other end of Ricky’s phone call to Ginny? There’s a lot going on in the Lingk household. Bill loves the “Ciao,  pope-card.” So does Matt, though he thinks it could have been Shelly. Bill sets us straight on Ricky’s obsession with the contracts. Roma nuggets for everyone!

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Minute 50: Sit on it, Williamson

December 20th, 2017

This one starts with a bit of insanity, and not surprisingly, some adult-diaper discussion. Pacino and David Robinson standing around on set was not, anatomically something Al appreciated. Matt wants to unwrap the super powers of the Fonz and, as an unexpected byproduct the boys take a crack at a “Who Would They Play: Happy Days Edition.” Ricky facetiously confesses straight away. Bill is suddenly a lighting designer. Ricky wants A LOT of reassurance AND that goddamned Cadillac.  Aaranow has achieved his level 2, stealth modification. The boys work out which side of Pacino’s Head is baseline for “flippity” and which is “floppity.” So, as always, really important stuff happening here people. Matt says that James Foley is British (he isn’t). Bill knows a Foley!!!! And he is contemplating stepping outside his one-square foot of comfort zone to help the show. Not to, fuck us up! To help men who are going out there trying to make a podcast. Bill finds himself to be very forgettable and Matt does not argue. Guys, Bill wrote it down so, you know... now it’s gospel. Matt would quit all of life’s pursuits to be the conductor on the “Runaway Roma Train” ride.

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Minute 49: Halfways and Bifurcations and Midpoints, Oh My

December 13th, 2017

Bill wants to drop it like it’s... something? It’s Act 2 people! Matt wants an “Old Saint Pacino" dropping down the chimney and the elf on the shelf seems to be an NSA operative. Bill tells us all how the midpoint is the essentially the halfway point and that it often comes between the two acts of a play... We are all overwhelmed with his tutelage. Matt thinks Al is at his most Scarface-ian at the top of this minute. The boys talk about being personally stole-robbered. Matt had myriad clues to steer clear of Bill as a podcast partner, but did he listen? No. Paul Butler gets alotta chatter. Matt imagines an alternate podcast title called “doughnut talk.” Williamson is trying to evade the Ricky missile. Bill imagines that Shelly had to deal with way more impediments during the robbery than Matt thinks he did. “Whack-a-Williamson” is born as well as a smattering of other “Romaville” attractions. Bill is heard to be “primrose path-ing” again. Matt reminds everyone that “Clueless” is a great movie. Bill introduces a new jingle to mostly solid reviews, though Bill does promise better jingles to come. Roma-claus wishes you a merry fucking Christmas.

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Minute 48: An Infinity of Perhapses

December 6th, 2017

The boys are agog at how the minutes are lining up and they revel in their good fortune. It’s no surprise at all, to discover that Bill is more polite than Matt. Ricky wants to show Jimmy something and he “whips out the brochure.” The fellas cast Cleavon Little. Bill tears thru an IMBD page and wants no chiming in from Matt. Matt wants Bill to enjoy more episodic television. Jere Burns gets a lotta chatter and rightfully so. The boys break down the brochure and the continuing Roma sales pitch. The fellas consider an “infinity of Perhapses.” Matt schools Bill on “second-acting”and also being grateful. We all agree that things that make us go out, better be puppy worthy. Nitty McPickerton wants the prop department to shove this sales brochure up their asses. Some housekeeping about Columbo and the Mamet family. An unprecedented SECOND “Who Would They Play” in one episode is forced upon the fellas by one Bob Urich. Some more Romaville spitballing.  The boys take a minute to celebrate the halfway point, and to look ahead to the second act!!!

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